I Know Whom I Have Believed.....Redux

Almost every day of my life I meet a friend or someone who may remember when I became "religious" back in 1982. They have seen me change my theology and churches and they may have seen me in my worst moments for surely I have given enough ammunition to cast aspersions on my profession of faith in Jesus Christ. I don't pretend to harbor the belief that they will see my ever-present wonderful disposition, courage and strength of character and then capitulate to the calling of God's Holy Spirit, for that is God's prerogative to call. What I do hope that they might see is a God who holds onto His own. I hope that in one of their more introspective moments they might see themselves in need of such a God who has mercy on the least and gives graces to persevere to the weakest. I hope that the joy that fills me to ecstacy might be seen through this personality that is still very much my own. The following blog was written August 30th 2009. It describe that time when God took a veil off of my eyes. I could rightly say then, and even moreso now,  I know whom I have believed


I walked in a Christian book store for the very first time early in 1982, browsed the shelves for a little while and wound up buying a book that peeked my interest. It was Evidence That Demands A Verdict by Josh McDowell. God had already been working upon my heart and my mind. I believe that I mentioned previously that I had just finished reading the Pulitzer Prize winning book (general non-fiction 1974) Denial Of Death by Ernest Becker, that made a good case against religion, and Eric Hoffer's small classic The True Believer that was a powerful work against anyone that believed anything passionately. I tore the Denial Of Death in half so that I could carry some of it with me. Then came Evidence That Demands A Verdict. It wasn't McDowell's intellect that effected me, nor even the truths in the book for many could have read it and not been affected. It certainly was not my decision to believe, for I probably would have fallen for any powerful philosophy at the time. I was a man with a void in my life. Were there any true purposes in this life? I was altruistic, or so I thought. It hadn't been that long since I volunteered and phoned an entire community of Democrats in support of Edward Kennedy's Pennsylvania primary campaign. God took a layer of veil off of my eyes. I had a glimpse of His majesty and I saw my purpose in life to become one more person to bathe in the sin cleansing blood of Calvary. Had I known the long path that I would have to take to even understand the gospel, I would have been severely discouraged. If I knew now my specific limitations and errors in my thinking I might be very saddened but not discouraged for I more fully understand that we indeed are pilgrims. His promises are true or I would not have made it this far. This  may sound naive but when I see an elderly person, feeble and wrinkled, a person who was young and attractive at one time, it consoles me greatly for I see the reality of a quickly passing life but I also see and agree with, as Paul wrote in his second epistle to Timothy, "I know whom I have believed!" Take a peek at your watch. You cannot stop what that second hand, moving before your eyes, represents. Do you have arguments against God or even His existence? There is hope, and that hope is in a veil over your eyes that can be lifted, and in Him who can do so. He turns no one away who has desired this!